The Children Under the Stairs: The Foster Care System:

The Children Under the Stairs—

Going Beyond the Foster Care System:

After watching the movie The Blind Side, a movie based on a prolific true story about a African American young man whose mother was a drug user and he lived in the projects. A Caucasian family took interest in him becoming his legal guardians and groomed him to be one of the best players in the NFL.

After seeing the movie about Michael, I was bought to think about how many other Michaels there are in the world that comes from broken and/or dysfunctional homes. It was personal for me, as my little brother, who many would consider a very blessed young man, straight A’s, football and basketball. Even made it to “Whose Who”…My little brother is an example not an exemption. Although both my brothers and I were raised in a single parented home. I think about those who are like my brothers best friend Gerry, who does not have either parent…no mother nor a father.

Over the years after my parents marriage, I often times reflect on my father, him as a man and him as my father. His faults and the lessons I have learned from growing up with out him fully present in my life. As a young lady…it’s hard, creating basically a skeptical cynic from birth about life, love and relationships. Being a child on the receiving end of broken relationships…it’s tough. Yet, I am happy I had one parent even if the other messed up!

What about those living with no parents? Could you have live on your own 12 or 15? Each year, thousands of young people “age out” of the foster care system, many without family or economic supports. Without connection to a caring adult and support to plan and prepare, these youth face steep challenges, including higher rates of unemployment, poor educational attainment, health issues, incarceration, and homelessness.

When I first met my little brother friend, Gerry, who lives in foster care with six other foster children, now brothers and sisters, mother and father…where there was none before. I know Gerry has it hard. He said to me one day, “Ms. Fareeda, you should adopt…adopt a boy”…kind of threw me off, and after looking into his life a little deeper I begin to see why he said what he said….He was looking for a chance or to give someone else a chance and an opportunity at life.

Although a well, soft hearted, mild mannered very caring young man, who I come to love as my little brother…I learned that Gerry’s living conditions in foster care are no better than if he would be living in a shelter, alone…He has trouble in school. Even as a teen, he urinates on himself, and wreaks sometimes where my family and I have to make him wash up, and provide him new socks and under garments. He cannot help his situation. Not only has he lived in the refuse…the other children do as well. It breaks my heart. Gerry is a good kid and could very well be a great man. The young mind is so impressionable.

My point with this blog entry…how are these children being prepared for life? And what programs are people are tapping that potential?

In school, behaviorally and academically they are just passed along so teachers do not have to deal with them. The movie bought to light a scary reality for many children who reside within the walls, and subways of Philadelphia streets, a real reality for those children who live within the shelter and the foster system and are still not getting adequate care….

“Approximately 3,000 children come into out-of-home care in Philadelphia each year. Many of these children are placed in temporary foster care while the family and social workers work together to build upon a family’s existing strengths, address concerns, and when at all possible, reunite the children with their family in a safe, loving home.

Unfortunately, this is not always possible, and it is sometimes necessary to find another permanent placement option for a child – in many situations this means adoption.”(1)

Unfortunately every homeless and parentless child cannot be brought about like the movie. Gerry lives in conditions that groom him for doom. What is up with the foster system? Are there provisions in place to make sure foster parents are not just collecting checks from the government and actually taking care of the Gerry’s of the world? I’m not a parent yet after learning more about him, I am inclined to help others who are like him and live like him. Is the foster system preparing or breeding individuals for prison? Is the foster system flawed or are the folks adopting many children abusers of the system?

We know all children have aspirations, strengths and talents, and the potential to become fully participating citizens who contribute in a range of fields. Yet, the main challenges facing young people in foster care and in the welfare system are: (1) the culture of low expectations for those in care and (2) the lack of accountability or real motivation for success or failure. A principle challenge is changing the thinking and current practices prevent many from taking on individual responsibility for preparing for a future of successful independence.

Until that happens, most young people coming out of the foster care will not be prepared for college and meaningful careers. Too many will continue to end up homeless, jobless, and incarcerated, without the resources they need to become successful adults. The fate of these children depends wholly on the goodwill of the community and their personal ability to persevere.

http://dhs.phila.gov/intranet/pgintrahome_pub.nsf/content/Adoption (1)

Contact:
Fareeda Mabry


Life, Liberty and Neighborhoods First!

RACISM: The Disease that infects us all…

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The Disease that infects us all…

Racism, no other disease infects the world more. Not Swine flu, Ebola, Cancer nor HIV/AIDS have infected the world more than the ignorance of racism. Racism since the days of slavery and the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s in its blatancy days is now a silent, subtle and passive/aggressive socially constructed tool used to manipulate, control, exploit and degrade people solely based on the color of someone’s skin.

Racism is man's gravest threat to man - the maximum of hatred for a minimum of reason.” Abraham J. Heschel

Born and raised from Philadelphia. Philadelphia is segregated, depending on race, class and political connections. In a world where everything is not just black and white, this disease has infected the entire world. It is races against races of people, and racism with in races. You better not call a Cambodian a Korean, or an African a Haitian, or a Columbian, a Puerto Rican, or someone Bi-Racial something totally absurd, or you are in trouble…People get angry when they are judge, stereotyped, or boxed into a group or category. When people make these honest everyday assumptions it is because we are taught to group and generalize people based on appearances.

True story, I remember being in a meeting, one of two other black people in that same meeting. The lead of the meeting was looking to target and recruit more African American professionals. The lead of the meeting was putting an event together and was looking for some kind of music that would appeal to blacks. He turned to me and asked about a particular group/artist and said, “Do black people like them?” I wanted to say how the hell should I know? I cannot speak on individual preferences. Some of my friends like rock music, and classical, others R and B/Jazz, some Hip/Hop and Rap, and others love Reggae! There is no set of music for people of color. People all over the globe listen to Beyonce, Elton John, and Jay Z, my point, music is universal, why as human beings, are we not as universal!

I was not sure if I should have been upset that he thought because I was black, I would be able to be the spokesperson for all blacks in Philadelphia, or was I a mere political pawn used to recruit more blacks to be the martyr. Or, just to play devils advocate, did ignorance blind the attendees at this meeting and they looked towards me as a leader and someone they needed to assist them in a better understanding on how African Americans think…? I ended up a little shocked, yet as many blacks staring down the face of (perceived or real) racism (blatant or subtle) you silently and gracefully brush it off.

I hate racial discrimination most intensely and all its manifestations. I have fought all my life; I fight now, and will do so until the end of my days. Even although I now happen to be tried by one, whose opinion I hold in high esteem, I detest most violently the set-up that surrounds me here. It makes me feel that I am a Black man in a White man's court. This should not be I should feel perfectly at ease and at home with the assurance that I am being tried by a fellow South African, who does not regard me as an inferior, entitled to a special type of justice.”

Nelson Mandela

God created the human race, not meant to be a competition among the races. Labels, stereotypes, stigmas and unspoken competition of who is more inferior among races perpetuate the racist mindset. They are ugly because they are darker, they are ugly because they have short hair, or long necks, or even stupid because of their skin. So much emphasis is put on skin, which is lighter or darker. As Justice Blakmum stated, "In order to get beyond racism, we must first take into account of race. There is no other way. And in order to treat some persons equally, we must treat them differently."

Race is anything but an anomaly. Racism is taught in the homes, schools, and institutions, and is generational. It comes from a lack of understanding of one another and a fear of moving closer to understand. Those same tried true beliefs are not working. Everyone is not going to like you. You cannot help how you are born into the world. You cannot change your color. Racism is meant to make you hate yourself. And what separates us in 2009 is baseless. When do we stop the anger, and start the healing? Stop the ignorance, and start the education? Racism the disease, it’s a mindset, and a form of mind control. My favorite quote from George Orwell, "He who controls the present, controls the past. He who controls the past, controls the future."

Let us stop this foolishness and embrace all of humanity. Starting with yourself. I cannot see how God loving people can love humanity, yet hate a certain set of humans? You love God, yet hate his creations? That is like having a pretty smile with no teeth, its contradictory! Racism a disease that destroys deteriorates and kills us all. To be a racist is an individual choice. It starts with me and you.

In Solidarity,

Fareeda “TheMaverick” Mabry

What Stinks About Philadelphia...? Is it the Economy or Attitudes?

Smiling is infectious. You can catch it like the flu.
When someone smiled at me today...I started smiling too!

I always loved that poem. Makes you wanna smile, and it is so true. Yet I find, in Philadelphia, this does not seem to hold the same truth. The streets are talking and Philadelphia is not the city that loves you back...

The City of Brotherly love has been named one of the most bloodiest cities, with murder rates and job-loss on the rise, no wonder everyone is on edge. I wonder, is or will Philadelphia ever be a great American city? Are our attitudes towards one another keeping us stagnant, and segregated? Or is it the challenges of the preceding economical conditions and we are stuck in a perpetual cycle?

I have heard the talk, Philadelphia is populated by a bunch of haters, backstabbers, gossipers, murderers, and judgmental racist? Isn't this true of everywhere in the world? Being a Philadelphian I understand. Yet, I also understand that these are issues are bigger than the current administration or any other administration. The problem may be the way Philadelphians mindsets are trained to view the world. the root cause of our current social, and economic decay. We can attribute today of the foundation of the post-Mayor Rizzo "off the cuff" era.

There was a lot of conflict with African Americans along with deliberate"block breaking" among the old Italians and Irish Catholic neighborhoods. Philadelphia is a generational city. Police brutality, nothing new. Crimes on police officers, nothing new....remember, people are still talking about Mumia Abu Jamal and Officer Daniel Faulkner. Some people who live on my small south Philadelphia street have remained in the same houses for over the last 20-30 years and have raised their families in the same household, sometimes even raising great grandchildren. Same house, and many times the same mentality for over 20 years. Now in 2009, people still carry those same attitudes.

I remember one 70ish Italian lady on the 47 bus, told me "I hope your not going down 9th and Washington, its like Vietnam down there, not like the good ole days, you never know what you are getting"...Philadelphia is about the tried and true, one thing I love about our city and that is one thing I hate....some things like the negative attitudes we have to let go. For me, I love the Italian Market. Where else can I get a huge bag of Italian rolls for 50 cents?
CHANGE is what Barack Obama and many other great leaders before him spoke of...

Einstein says it best, "You cannot change a problem with the same mind that created it, you must change your way of thinking in order to solve the problem". How do you cease the blatancy of hate among the people and political divides with the elected and the community?

Depends on who you ask? Knowing many people from diverse walks of life, I am very sensitive to others, how they live, how they think, how they learn etc...People are different. God called us all from the boat to be someone, whether it be mother, doctor, or repairman.

Do Philadelphians not understand those differences that make up who we are? Philadelphia residents make up our administrations, political leaders, policy makes, and movers and shakers. From a sociological perspective, an unbalanced government maybe causing our unbalanced minds, as humans we are not immune to our environment.

Like we are what we eat, that also comes from family lives, friends, associations etc... Or are resources so scarce certain classes and groups are excluded or blocked through bureaucratic and systematic barriers, needs go unmet, unaddressed, or undeserved because of the declining conditions and that causes a stressful situation?

Philadelphia's attitude separates more than it integrates us, economically and politically. The stress and embitterment you see in your daily travels could very well stem from the mindset embedded throughout our history, taught in our schools, in our homes, practiced in our courts, and housed within our government.

This is reflected in our consistent economical struggles and historical political play to pay mentality keeping our city in stagnation. Its not just African American nor a Caucasian thing, its a Philadelphia thing. What makes us "hate" one another? My friends who are not from here are the happiest, and then within 2-3 years, if not sooner...they are ready back home or to another city. Are we really that bad! And they are the ones who generally have a better attitude toward life in general.

Even Rizzo's old neighborhood South Philadelphia has transformed to reflect a microcosm of the world, Hispanics, Asians, and African Americans from all walks of life, newly transplanted live alongside those who have been there for a generation. Change is inevitable. The mind reflects reality. Thoughts become actions. Yet, if those same folks you see and label "haters" are the ones controlling a system with a foundation built on conflict, division, racism, hatred...we are still in trouble as a city!!! Solving the problem starts with yourself.
At 31, I have seen it on many different levels. My own experiences, trials and tribulations have taught me a lot...Philadelphia can be very oppressive, with an eccentric overall personality...Philly there is no place like it, and it has its little nuggets of beauty. Philadelphians have so lot in common, cheesesteaks, our love for arts, parks, parades, the Phillies, the Eagles... Philadelphia as a city and those who reside here undeniably test your strength. The key: Never go too deep in shallow situations. Don't be part of the problem, be part of the solution. Maneuver beyond the crab in the barrel, small town-big town mentality by always being your own person. Be the change you wish to see. Spread the sunshine, say hello and smile even when others are not! Be positive when others are negative, and treat others the way you would like to be treated!

Fareeda "TheMaverick" Mabry